oh. my. goodness.

isn't summer great? you and the kids get to sleep till 8 or 8:30. you make a delicious, hot breakfast every morning that the kids devour. you put on bathing suits and hop on over to the pool, where you spend the rest of the day basking in the sun and tossing pennies into the baby pool. you get a great tan, meet up with the other pool moms with nothing to do, and talk about recipes and tennis camps for your children. and that's just the weekdays. weekends are for family trips to educational places where the children sit in their booster seats and play 'i spy' while you have deep and meaningful conversations with your husbands.

i hope you're enjoying it.

because in plueworld, it's a zoo. there's a daddy who works just as hard when kids aren't in the building as he does when they're there. something about scheduling and getting them into the classes they want. pi-shaw. there's a mama who's looking at a possible large change in job status....at the same time she starts graduate school, too. there are two little girls who need swimming lessons in the worst way and are finally getting them this week. the same two little girls are tired and cranky and don't stay in their beds at night, despite the fact that they PROMISED they would if only their parents put the bunk beds back together. there's a freezer full of food but a family not getting to it until close to seven pm, and by then it's almost too late, so children eat nuked chicken nuggets and mama feels guilty later. there is a growing list of people who are due a visit from the plues, but few to none of them will receive it because it cannot be fit in. there's a dog who hasn't been groomed since christmas. there's a project list SOMEWHERE. and dust bunnies EVERYWHERE.

but we stop everything and go to the pool every saturday to feel normal. and this saturday, it'll be even better because g and j will put their faces in the water. big deal around here.

and, soon soon soon, we have a week OFF. a week at my favorite place in the world (http://www.kanuga.org/) --perhaps because i'm not well-travelled, and perhaps because it's just so peaceful and stress-free-- where we will take the time to reconnect with one another, push the pause button on our lives, and remember why it is that we work so hard during all the other times of the year. because we have to, and because we kind of like it.

free at last.

oh yeah...doing the happy dance. it's done. a few months off with no ballet! i'm gearing up to be Best (Rebel) Ballet Parent next year, but for now i'll relish the fact that i survived the year and NOW i just might know what i've gotten myself into.

i have reminded a few old-timer ballet parents that they should have taken me under their wing if i was expected to play by all the rules, but since i was the rogue who made it up as she went along, noone really thought i'd do any better than i did. so--success, all around.

to the mom who thought she was doing me a favor by reminding me that my youngest child's bob was not all the way in a bun, according to regulation: "_________." (insert phrase that i don't want my children to think i say out loud).

to the person out there in computerland who has two girls, sizes five and four, who want to be cotton candy girls with hot pink costumes for halloween this year: call me. let's talk. if i never have to look at these costumes again, it'll be too soon. they are yours.

to the person who invented cheap plastic trophies: you rock because my kids think that their 'i survived year one' trophies are the cat's meow, and getting called on stage to get one is like the best thing ever.

lots of pictures, and i'm even going to try my hand at uploading a video of rehearsal. actually the pictures are from rehearsal too-- no cameras allowed. rules, you know.

recital week.

who knew?

i'm a first-year ballet mom. someone should have warned me.

the week of a recital is BRUTAL. and it's only halfway over. the end result will be cute and frilly and wonderful, but the schedule is insane for two little girls who have a 2 minute dance at the beginning of a long recital.

someone told me to make sure i purchased flowers so that i could present each of the girls with one after their performance is over.

are you kidding me? i think the parents should be the ones getting the flowers.

pictures to come. recital is saturday afternoon. thank goodness monday is a holiday. need the vacation!

a little country in our cityworld

here's the garden kevin and the girls are planting! the pictures make it look like we have this huge space for a garden, but the reality is that it's just a spot next to our driveway. the beans are in, the tomato plants are in, and maybe peppers?? i don't know. i eat it, but i have nothing to do with the planting. kevin bought eggplant also. start sending me recipes. i like the color eggplant very much, but can't tell you if i've ever eaten it. guess i better learn.

threw in a couple of other weekend pictures as well. baby dylan is my friend karen's little one. he's precious and my girls love him. happy first birthday!!

these were in the middle of the night when i heard stirring-- it was well after midnight and the kiddies were rarin' to go....

first time bowlers

had we known this would be such a big hit, we would have done this before now.

side note: when did bowling get to cost fifty bucks for a family to bowl two games???






love this: just waiting, waiting for the ball to get down the alley....

may resolution:

no more writing about my sick children. if it's old for me, it's old for everyone.

i enjoyed my mother's day with a Day of Me. i need more of those. my Day of Me included not making any meals or doing any laundry. meals were handled by my wonderful husband who took us to brunch after church and made steaks for dinner. the laundry thing was just a simple weekend boycott-- so i've got plenty to catch up on this weekend! the girls always make sweet cards at school, and i loved those.

when queried what mother's day actually was, my children decided that it meant that i was not allowed to yell or make anyone sit in the uncooperative chair all day long. so i didn't.

i know. i'm the mother of the year when the bar is set so high!

hold your applause

...i'd like to publicly thank the parent of the year who so thoughtfully brought his obviously-infected-with-a-stomach-bug child to a certain birthday party on saturday night.

i'm completely overflowing with things i'd like to say to you. but i can't: i've got a sick kid on my hands.

karma, baby.

i'm totally my mother...

...which, to be perfectly honest, is not a goal i wanted to achieve had you asked me twenty years ago. but the story has a happy ending, so for my mom who will undoubtedly read this: don't panic.

i was not a person my parents liked. to them i was sour and negative. i was argumentative and stubborn. (all true.) i still struggle with that, because i was a good kid. i mean REALLY good. i never once, not my entire life, had to stay after school for detention. i was never tardy. i never smoked or had friends who did. i never snuck (yes, i know it's not a word, but i like it!) out of the house. i never even considered it. my parents had a good-sized bar in our house, and i was not tempted even one time to have a little sip and refill with water. i could not tell you what marijuana smelled like, and to this day if you're smoking a pipe (not the crack kind silly, the tobacco kind) :) the two smells are completely the same to me.

people trusted me to keep their children when i was in the sixth grade. i had a regular babysitting job with a nice family every single saturday night, from the time i was a freshman through my senior year in high school. **no snickering. a looker i was not, and they were certainly not lined up. okay, so i did have a date to the prom one year. it was monumental.

i was the one in class that everyone talked to, had no enemies, yet was never invited to the cool kid parties. people copied my homework every single day, and i let them because i was a genuinely nice person and from my perspective, it wasn't cheating. i brought teachers suck-up gifts every chance i got. they loved me.

i had a couple of close girlfriends and i was content. but not really.

my family was SO nuclear. my mom literally baked four googillion cookies during my junior high and high school days. my dad worked for the same organization his entire working life. they were always financially and emotionally stable. my sisters were stars in their own ways; i had a cute, bubbly, fun little sister whom everyone adored, and of whom i was immensely jealous for many years. my ultra-intelligent older sister was a musical prodigy and had clear direction and purpose and no time for any deviation of that plan.

i always felt i was born into the wrong family. i seriously had (have) no talents or gifts to offer other than my wonderful self. my parents, by my own perception, treated me far differently than my sisters. i truly believe that birth order is everything, and that middle child syndrome exists, and that parents--without intending to-- can and do choose favorites. (now you know the real reason why i only have two children. no middles!) i felt the standards were different for me and i would never measure up. i was a good kid elsewhere, but i spent my whole life in trouble at home. i was so stubborn. (still am.) i didn't GET my parents, and they didn't get me. my ideas of the world and how it should work were unformulated at that time, yet i felt i needed to be argumentative just to show i had gumption. i would not give respect unless it was shown to me, which turned out to be the precise attitude i struggled to overcome with my own high schoolers once i became a teacher. i knew everything, yet nothing. we were a strange combination, my family and me, always.

and, my senior year, i was desperate to leave. i honestly didn't care where i went to college, so long as i was far, far away from The House. i hung a homemade paper calendar on my door with a countdown to how many days till i left the house. my mother didn't make me take it down because she wanted me to go as badly as i did. how terrible on both our parts.

and i went away. and i stayed away. and, to everyone's surprise, i flourished and grew my own ideas this time, and i did okay. i made mistakes, not terrible ones, but enough to learn how i wanted my life to work. i knew how to do it because somewhere in those long weekends of being on lockdown in my room for refusing to do SOMETHING, i had to make a decision whether or not to take my pent-up anger and use it for something good or something not-so-good.

and i got married. i married someone my parents didn't initially think was so good for me. i didn't care; i knew they would change their minds, and they did.

and then, i had kids. and boy oh boy, does that change things. i am literally my mother done over again. i have the same ideas on child-rearing. the words that come out of my mouth are precisely the words she barraged me with forEVER and yet they seem so appropriate to say now. i have different views than most people i know on how i want my children raised, and all of that comes from her. she was there at every critical moment and i never even noticed. she never let me want for anything (except trying out for cheerleading; something i'll never forget!) and i bet i never thanked her. i don't remember a time us telling each other that we loved one another until i was an adult. how wrong of me to be so selfish.

and, turning the corner to another mother's day, my sixth one and my mother's 36th, i am so grateful that she raised me to be who i am today. had it been easy for me then, no doubt i'd be having a hard time now.

and i'm not. i'm okay. i'm more than okay. i'm perfect.

and, for that, i'm thankful.

happy mother's day to mine, and to you and yours.

little girls acting like little girls....

...and not big girls is a task that proves more difficult by the day.

last week, a very good friend invited my kids to a party at a place called SWEET AND SASSY. sassy is not a word i would want used to describe my girls' tone, demeanor, appearance, or anything else. ever. apparently this is a place where little girls go, get all dolled up-- and i don't mean in their mother's old lingerie and high heels from a dress-up box, either. they are DECKED out in jewels and sparkles and heels that FIT THEM. they get fully made up and walk down a catwalk in a fashion show. i envision hips jutting out, hand on one of them, chins up, and a pouty look on their made up face. NO THANK YOU. i declined, which was no surprise to my friend, and the kids are none the wiser. but then...

monday was picture day for the ballet studio and georgia and jules had to wear their recital costumes for the class picture.

now, normally i am the one mom rushing to daycare from work to pick up her children to have them change in the car. juliet is pretty easy. then when we get there, i park and slap georgia's hair up in the most mangled hairnet contraption you can imagine so that she is presentable for class. georgia's bun ALWAYS falls out during class and another mom has to help fix it sometimes; otherwise, TOO BAD but she is the one little girl with a sweaty ponytail. i always am the last one into the studio and all of the other calm, cool mothers who homeschool their children and have had ALL DAY to shove bobby pins in a bun look at me funny.

but this particular day i left my office an EXTRA fifteen minutes early to ensure i'd have a good looking bun and NOT be the last one there. plus, i was told that juliet and her little bob had to have a bun too. come on, are you serious!!?? apparently so. panic ensued when i opened the door to the studio. the aqua-net cloud was billowing. moms were standing there, each one with a mascara wand and lipstick tube in their hand.

georgia says: you didn't tell me i could wear MAKEUP.

i say: you're right. because you can't.

juliet says: abby is four and she's getting makeup on.

i say: look over there-- abby's crying because the hair spray got in her eyes. that mascara was a mistake.

they want hair spray too, which i didn't bring. i tell them to stand over by sarah and see if any hairspray hits her head. (it did.)

am i mean for not allowing my children to wear makeup, even if for a picture? are they any less cute by being kids and not baby teenagers? i guess it doesn't matter what the answer is. i don't want them to have a taste for what life is like 10 years from now. i want them to feel beautiful just the way they are and not be itching to grow up too fast. let those mothers judge me. they can add 'doesn't allow makeup' to their growing list. while they are at home creating organic, homemade dinners, their kids are watching hannah montana and DYING to be in high school. mine still think the backyardigans are what cool kids watch.

here are my children, au naturel and camera-ready. sorry if their eyelashes don't pop out visually. i think they look fine the way they are!! :)

house of strep throat

GOOD LORD IN HEAVEN. why on earth do i send my children to daycare and work outside of the home???? is it worth it? two more sets of antibiotics for two children who just HAD this thing back in february. when i was at home, they almost never got sick. never had antibiotics, either one, until the last year or so.

it is wednesday and i'm happily back at work. now that i've just spent two days playing nursemaid to two Pitiful Pearls, i'm ready to tackle the mountain on my desk.

tips i learned from being at home this week:

1. mixing that nasty white medicine in orange juice will make it palatable for kids who hate medicine!
2. avoid orange juice if your child says their stomach hurts.
3. buying coloring books and activities for your kids to do while you get *extra* things done around the house is a waste of money. all they want is for you to hold them and breathe on you while you watch the same episode of the little einsteins over and over again.
4. i cook pretty well when i have the time to prepare a real meal. problem is, noone wants to eat it when they're sick, and i'm too tired and grouchy to care how it tastes anyway.
5. even if the tylenol kicks in at just the right moment that you convince yourself that the kids are feeling better and they should go on to ballet class because, by golly, you're paying $68 dollars a month for it, think again.

oh, happy day! everyone is back at daycare this morning and they can recycle germs again.

(i forgot to post pictures last time so here are some pre-strep shots).

'pigs in the park' celebration last week....sounds hokey but it was fun!


peace, homies.


georgia on the monkey bars.


i loved this shot of juliet on the swings.


look who can do the dishes!

house of coveters

i picked up the girls from daycare the other day with a surprise. sears-- a place i never go unless kevin is dragging us there to look at a tool or something!!-- has amazing kid clothing sales, i discovered. PLUS, they had a large selection of spring clothes DIRT CHEAP with no characters, glitter, embroidery, logos-- perfect for my mix-and-match children. so i picked up a couple of things for each one and true to form, had no sooner gotten them buckled in their booster seats when i whipped out the new duds. (we all know i hate surprises....).

a few minutes later, i see jules in the rearview mirror with her arms crossed, a massively unattractive scowl, and a lip curled upward. "what's your issue?" i so nicely ask. "you'll never have any friends if you look at them the way you're looking at me right now!" she proceeds to whine about how georgia got three things and she only got two. it. is. not. fair. hmmph. she crossed her arms tighter, just for effect.

i was all set to pull over and was already preparing the lecture at the same time -- the one about saying thank you whether you wanted to or not, and how fortunate she was that i had enough funds in the checking account to make a surprise purchase (really fortunate, let me tell you!!) and how i was taking all her stuff back since she was so incredibly bratty. i can't stand brats, and she was a big one at that moment.

but georgia saved the day. she turns to her sister and says: "you. you. you. you coveter!" not clearly hearing what she said, i ask her to repeat it. she asks me if i remember the ten commandments and what god says about wanting things other people have.

oh yeah! i knew i made the right choice of daycares (disregarding the spitting incident)!! that ten-week ten commandment summer program did the trick. now i don't even NEED my lecture because juliet is upset that she broke a commandment.

problem solved. bratty kid moment averted.

until the next time. hope georgia is around then to dispense biblical advice.

back in the saddle again....

that was a long stretch. i admit it. i quickly fell into a rut of not feeling well/kevin not feeling well/going on a couple of weekend jaunts/and general slack-off mode with regard to my blog. i'll try to do better.

spring has almost sprung here, which is a good thing. this is the time of year where, in my house, we're desperate for warmer air, something--anything!!--growing outside, so that our winter spirits may be lifted. it is at the end of march every year when i get a small taste of spring, only to be extremely disappointed the next day when another cold snap hits us smack in the face. that happened last week, and this week it's cold and rainy so far.

we took a day off about a month ago--all of us!!--after the fog of sickness had lifted from our house. it wasn't a real day off for kevin, who had a job fair in wilmington to recruit teachers. but it was a great opportunity to drive to the beach for one day, see my sister, and get away from it all! it was a gorgeous day and we got some great pictures of the girls.

kevin had a birthday in march. then came my annual self-advocacy convention in winston-salem, one of the highlights of my year. self-advocates are individuals with developmental disabilities who choose where and with whom they want to work, live, socialize, worship--whatever. self-advocacy is a growing movement in the world of developmental disabilities and my agency sends a group every year to this convention. they learn about health and safety issues, current public policy issues facing this population, accessing affordable housing, finding a job they want to have....things like that. it's also a great time and reaffirms for me always that i work in a field that i love. my job may stink sometimes. i think everyone's does. but i come home so incredibly proud of what my self-advocates accomplish, and so incredibly grateful for the opportunity to teach my children what it means to be accepting, tolerant, and kind to people who have developmental disabilities. it is a source of great pride that they can and do choose to socialize with people who are quite different cognitively, emotionally, behaviorally, than they. we've taught them to ask questions and be patient and show others that this is not something to fear. with permission, i'm showing some of the pictures from my weekend in winston below.

we spent easter with my parents. wonder of all wonders, the easter bunny found the town of chocowinity, north carolina. we all had our doubts based on its remote location, but it did happen! i have pictures of that weekend also. georgia finally found her bike balance, and she's now an official bike rider. one more step towards big girl-hood. juliet can't keep up, and i have a feeling she won't be that far behind her sister.

happy april first to all!



jules and georgia testing out the *chilly* waters of wrightsville beach.






another birthday; another cake i did not make.

our group in winston-salem. such a great weekend.

here's jake, pimped out and ready to hit the club.

home again. just in time for our neighborhood easter egg hunt. does my house look crooked or what??? like it could break right in half!


how did this deer find his way to chocowinity?? santa must be looking for him.


a friend from church let the girls come play farmer franny for an afternoon while daddy swiped about 5 truckloads of mulch. the girls are convinced--as is daddy-- that country life may be the way to go for the plues. lord help me.



though, i must admit, the girls are CUTE little farmhands!


how cute is this face? who would think she went off the deep end of the river normal when i told her to get off the swing and get in the car!

hack. sniffle. snort. repeat.

last week it was strep for the kids. good mother that i am, the only reason i know it was strep was because i happened to have to take juliet to the doctor for a WELL visit. both tested positive at that time. TWO co-pays later, two antibiotics later at $15.00 apiece, i am thinking to myself that i should have NEVER taken her for a check-up! i was directed to take both home and that they must stay home from daycare for a whole 24 hours. you know, daycare: that place where they picked up the germs in the first place. forget that! i only planned to take 2 hours off work for a quick check-up. they were acting FINE. i shoved medicine into their little mouths in the parking lot of the pharmacy, both of them wailing the whole time (told you i'm a good mother) and high-tailed it back to daycare. noone was any the wiser.

then kevin got it. he won't take medicine because, as he so eloquently put it, when he's old and sickly he doesn't want to be immune to antibiotics. that makes So Much Sense, dear. i think the amount of sympathy you get from being sick is directly proportional to how much you're willing to do to fix the situation. and i'm sick too. however, i do take medicine when it's appropriate and i think that should get me extra sympathy points. maybe i should try harder. :)

but being sick does have its perks at work. my boss is way less likely to yell for me to come into her office, and people kind of leave you alone when they think you might be germy. when i answer the phone people immediately get it that i'm sick, so they don't keep me on the phone for an hour. so i've had quite a bit of time to stalk blogs this week. i might just have to create an anonymous blog for my rants and REALLY funny stories. you know, the ones that i don't want my husband or family to read. i have some doozies. i need to totally work on that.

but, for now, i'm off to find cough drops.

OH YEAH. i registered georgia for kindergarten this morning. without. any. tears. that is a huge step for me. of course, all the paperwork was previously filled out, and i didn't have her with me-- all i did was simply drop it off at the school. but i didn't cry or even have that swelling in my throat like i COULD have cried. (maybe i was too busy coughing.) see, there are perks to being sick: you don't look like that ridiculously dramatic parent that i used to make fun of when i was teaching public school! i have been using The Kindergarten Card for a long time with my children, in order to get them to do what i want them to do. that sounds like a post for another time. it has been a lifesaver!

i do have a real job, you know...

besides keeping my blog up. thanks for everyone's concern, though! you can always tell when my boss is out of the office. you'll see i have WAY more frequent posts. it's been a bit of a busy time in my working world. as for today, it's a friday afternoon and i should be packing it all in for another weekend but if i don't give out some kind of update, i'll be starting a trend of not following through on things i am supposed to keep up with-- kind of like my new years resolution and my lenten discipline!!

i'm a year older. nobody cares, myself included, but i'm officially middle-aged according to my own self-reflection. (nobody else's, so don't whine about how young i REALLY am.) my girls brought me flowers and we had a nice dinner and noone went to a lot of trouble and it was all very nice-- that's the way i like it.

now, my baby is a year older too. juliet turned four last sunday. sniff, sniff. as everyone in my world knows, we only do birthday parties when it is absolutely necessary. this was juliet's first celebration of her birth. georgia had one at four years also, and now i'm in the clear until at least--the very least-- georgia turns seven. or eight. or maybe even nine. i just hate the birthday party thing. but this year, it was fabulous. i broke out my old-school tricks and we had a mcdonald's birthday party. for less...way, way less... than i would spend for a party at home, eighteen of our close personal friends had 2 hours of crazy play time, a happy meal, birthday cake, a goody bag, decent decorations, and i didn't have to set up or clean up. this was awesome! i highly recommend it. however, the key was going to a swanky part of charlotte for the mcdonalds because the children refer to our local one as the 'dirty mcdonalds'. pictures are below, but i have a friend sending hers to me because my camera battery died. i'll post those when they arrive. we brought the loot home to open, so i have pictures of party #1 and party #2.

juliet got a bike from the birthday fairy. while kevin had the wrench out putting it together, he took off the training wheels on georgia's bike. we've practiced a few times and she's getting the hang of it. in the grass. without using the brake. on a completely flat surface. only time will tell how dramatic this endeavor becomes, and i'll keep you posted.

note the birthday cake. made from scratch-- my favorite, coconut!!! it was so good. i've convinced at least one of my kids that this, too, is HER favorite cake and she now requests it on her birthday. MASTER brainwasher that i am.... but no, of COURSE i didn't make it. this was my mom's contribution.

party #3 involved a cake at preschool. another sugar-infused afternoon of fun. by the end of the weekend, i was birthday-ed out.

on february 14th, my little valentines woke up with new t-shirts on their beds. they looked sweet for about four seconds yesterday morning, so i took their picture. sweet babies. they worked so hard writing their names on their valentines, and it's fun to see how excited they get when their friends give them valentines back. reminds me of when i was a kid....

that's it! pictures finally made it up here. it's president's day and noone told me until the last minute that my office is actually closed today, so here i sit. i guess i'll use my time wisely and clean up the mounting pile on my desk. happy monday.

t-r-o-u-b-l-e

so yesterday, i was coming out of a school meeting for one of my clients when i picked up a voicemail. i hadn't had a signal the whole two hours during the meeting so when i realized it came from the kids' daycare, i got a bit panicky. the message was:

"this is carolyn from the daycare. please call me as soon as you get this message."

two thoughts race through my head. one, she's sick. CRAP. DAMMIT. (a few other choice words).

the other: she's hurt. not so much cussing there; a tad more concern is exhibited.

i call back immediately, which is now more than two hours since the first call.

the assistant director was on the line. she greets me, and i say: "what's going on???"... she tells me:

georgia spit in another child's face at breakfast this morning.

come again? say WHAT?

i say in a very soft, low voice: put her on the phone. right now. blood pressure sky-high.

she's sobbing and incomprehensible by the time she gets to the phone. i told her how disappointed i was in her and that it was not going to be a pleasant evening for her. she sputtered out that she was sorry. i rambled on and on about an apology letter she'd have to write (draw) and that there was no movie night on friday. i hang up.

i call kevin. i tell him: can you BELIEVE what our child has done??? we need to have a plan for this. my child SPITTING at anything has not ever entered my mind. not polly prissy-pants.

kevin decides to leave work and pay the daycare a visit to express his disappointment in our child. when grownups tell me my child has misbehaved, i believe them. (it's the way i was raised!)

she is sad and crying and apologetic but offers no explanation. the assistant director happened to mention to kevin when asked that-- well, no, an adult didn't actually SEE this happen, but the kids all said she did it, and georgia herself admitted it too. so there. end of story.

hmm. that's the cluephone ringing. PICK IT UP, melinda.

when i picked up the children in the afternoon, we went straight home. the little einsteins went on the television for juliet while i had a talk with georgia. i tell her: please no crying! i cannot understand you through the dramatics. suck it up, wipe them dry, and tell me exactly what happened.

she says: i was just trying to say the word for that THING.

what thing?

pie ranger.

heh? what's a pie ranger?

it's that thing that austin was for happyhalloween. you know, boys like them. not girls.

(POWER ranger. got it!)

i was trying to say it and my P got stuck, and one little tiny poke came out of my mouth and it hit savannah on the cheek.

oh.

now i feel like a dog. a big one. but my first thought is: I HAVE TO SAVE FACE HERE. i am The Parent, after all.

so i say: why in the world did you not tell your teacher that? she says: all she asked me was if i spit on savannah, and i told her yes. you say i have to tell the truth, and that was the truth.

now i really feel bad. but i quickly rally and give this long and drawn-out explanation that if, indeed, your school or another parent calls me to tell me you are in trouble, You Are SO In Trouble. period. you better get used to that now because this is not up for discussion. i tell her: it's up to you to defend yourself if you don't think what you did was wrong. you better find your voice and use it. you would argue with me at home if you felt you were wrongly accused; you better do it at school too!-- and with good manners and a good tone. you spent all day long feeling miserable about being in trouble at home when all you had to do was tell your teacher that you didn't mean to do it. Let This Be A Lesson To You.

now, go and draw that apology picture just for the heck of it.

and she did.

was i too harsh? i don't know. i'm mildly amused today and mildly irritated at a daycare that jumped to conclusions (as if i didn't do the same thing myself!). but i find myself struggling in that gray space of howmyparentsdidit versus howeverybodyelsedoesit. i have a feeling this internal battle will go on forever!

the blizzard upon us...

it starting snowing here in the charlotte area LONG after i went to sleep. snow where i live is a rare occurence and cause for panic attacks at walmarts and grocery stores everywhere!!!.... this was evident when i stopped at food lion with the girls on the way home from work. there was a cashier at each and every line. each register had 8-10 people waiting to check out. THERE WAS NO MILK. THERE WERE NO EGGS. it is laughable how we act in the south when there's even a THREAT of a flurry. this was around 4:30 yesterday afternoon.

so, when we woke up this morning, there now sits about 3/4 of ONE INCH of snow. and the world is pretty much shut down. our school system had only a 2 hour delay, but everything else around us is closed today. it's pouring down rain and the snow is melting. maybe it will freeze; who knows? the girls couldn't believe that there was snow, and then they were so disappointed to learn that they couldn't build a snowman. i told them we'd have to gather up all the snow in monroe to build a snowman and georgia says: "okay. i'll go get a bucket."

as i'm sitting at my desk at work, my boss calls me on my cell phone to tell me it's okay if i stay home this morning, to just come in around lunchtime. THANKS A LOT. i'm lonely in this big building all by my lonesome!

i guess i can cruise around the internet now, searching for something to make for dinner that doesn't involve frozen potatoes of some sort or spaghetti-o's. i'll take any suggestions!!! i fact, i am in need of some easy weeknight supper ideas. send them my way!!! just remember my stance on anything with mushrooms-- keep it to yourself!

happy almost weekend!

weekend pictures...

because i got a little heavy there on friday! we had a great weekend.

the girls went to an indoor carnival and had a blast. any time you throw a jumpy-jump in a room and offer cotton candy afterwards, it's a winner!

that was friday night.

i caught them playing school in my bathroom, for some reason. don't ask me but it kept them occupied for quite a while yesterday afternoon!

raising helen...

is a movie i saw for the first time this week. with this writer's strike, we all know there's nothing good on television and so i'm trying to catch up on *good* movies that i've never seen. the list is endless because if it's not a disney movie, little einsteins, or a really bad movie called 'candy land', i haven't seen it.

raising helen is not really a great movie, after all is said and done. but, that said, i managed to watch the whole thing. it focused on a cute, rich, thin, bubbly woman who is asked to raise her sister's kids after she suddenly dies. it hit me--not for the first time, either-- after i was done watching it that the 'who gets 'em' discussion needs to be revisited in my house again.


i just don't have any good solution here. i have a family. kevin has a family. we have friends. but there's not a single person i know (or am related to...) ... (or i can even fathom) ... that would fit the bill for us. in the movie, during the tearjerker moment when the two living sisters are talking about WHY kate hudson's character was chosen, one of them said something that stuck with me: we shouldn't choose the person who would be the most obvious choice-- the responsible sibling with 4 kids already....the across-town grandparent who raised us: we want--need-- our children to be raised by someone who would most closely match the way kevin and i would do it, no matter how far they are or the upheaval in that person's life. i don't know anyone who could or would do that for us. i don't know anyone who could come close.


and-- i really do want my kids to be raised here, if possible. i wouldn't want their lives interrupted any more than they already would be. i'd like them to have the support of the people they already know--their friends, their school, their church. i'd like them to have younger-ish folks raising them, people at least CLOSE to the age of their own parents. no grandparent should have to raise their children's children. it's too much. kevin's sibling is obviously out of the question. my sisters, and there are two, are the next most obvious choice. but they both are single, focused on careers, and they're great aunts but they would have no idea how to raise kids. especially mine! i say that with love, if they are reading. :) i have a couple of friends who i think MIGHT fit the bill, but those people have kids already. how do you even begin to burden someone who's not related to you (or someone who is...) by having them become parents twice over to someone else's kids?


i used to pray that god would take kevin and me together, at the same time, so that we wouldn't have to live life without the other. i still hope for that--i just hope that it's when our girls are grown!

so i guess i'm taking applications. who out there (this is rhetorical, people) knows how i do things? who will ensure that my girls never find out that mamas really DON'T have magic eyes? who will make them believe that they really DON'T let you into kindergarten if you can't put your face under water? who will remind them that they're not too good to share a sock and underwear drawer with their sister for all of eternity (or until i have more space!)? who will tell them each and every day that they are so blessed and fortunate that they have a place to live, food to eat, a car to ride in, and that every time they get a new toy, they must give up an older one to a less fortunate person? who will make them socialize with all sorts of people, even those with disabilities, so that they understand how to interact with anyone who crosses their path? who else will not be mad in the morning when they wake up with juliet's feet in their face and georgia's pallet at the foot of the bed while the grownups are hanging on for dear life at the edge of the bed?

i know the answer. nobody can do that and love them like we do. but i have to keep looking until i find the person who would come closest. until then, i'm driving Extra Careful and i'm going to stop watching some of these cathartic movies!!!

ballet for little juliet

oh boy. you have never seen such an excited little thing as monday when i picked up the girls for the first day of ballet class for the semester. the girls are now in the same class and juliet used some of her christmas money (i swear it was not my idea!) for ballet slippers and a leotard (i hate that word!). she's been practicing over the holidays but today was the big debut. miss bonita told the class about the spring recital-- a circus theme-- and that their class will be performing as cotton candy. i don't really get it-- i'm a pretty in-the-box thinker and so telling children they'll have to be living, breathing, spun sugar set to music is a bit out of my realm of thinking. but my kids DO get it, and they're super excited. here are a couple of pictures from the studio from monday---

you know what i really love?

i'll tell you. it's NOT new year's. resolutions are stupid (having made and broken every one EVER!!) and i resolve to not make any more. it's not fridays, or at least this one. this has been a bad week for me and i hate keeping things inside when i'm dying to share them. it's not my dog, who can't stop running away and it's ticking me off. it's not even this package of peppermint oreos that someone (foolishly) left on my desk because they didn't want the temptation of eating them.

it's my new DENTAL HYGIENIST. (did i spell that right??). i absolutely detest going to the dentist and have been a dental nomad (switching every time it was time for an appointment because i found something wrong with the previous person) for years. but i have found one here, within walking distance from both home and work, and when i trudged in this morning for a cleaning, after it was all done, my new best friend amy never once mentioned how little i floss. she says: your teeth, your gums-- they look great!!! that made my day. now-- when i have to get that one little cavity filled in two weeks, it may be a different story, but for now, i'm smiling through my (sore) teeth.